3 April 2011
I have a neighbour. His name is Stefano. He is, what I’d consider, a fiddler. A tinkerer. Whenever I’m washing dishes, looking out the kitchen window, he’s out in his yard doing something. Even in the dead of winter with a foot of snow on the ground. I have no idea what he’s doing, but he’s there.
He’s always got projects on the go; he’s in the middle of building a basement suite right now. He owns a little digger machine that he uses to tear up his yard. Over the fall he dug this massive hole in the front lawn. He was intending on installing a pond, but now has different plans. He planted blueberry bushes, not in his own yard, but along the nature strip near the sidewalk outside his fence.
He points over the yard telling me where things will be. Where what fruit tree is where; where the herbs will be; where he’s going to build some berms for planting some vegetables (apparently this will be good to lessen the effects of the wind). We were strolling around my backyard and he noticed that some of the trees were overgrown. He disappeared for a few minutes and came back with a saw and pruning sheers and just started trimming.
Gussying up the place
Dave and I have been advertising our third room to rent. Female preferred, our ad reads. I don’t want to live with all guys in the house; I thought a female presence would balance the energy nicely around here. We had a couple girls come through to check out the place. The second one I thought would take it. She didn’t. Then it hit me. We live in a dude’s pad. If I was a girl coming to look at the place I wouldn’t move in here either.
Moose antlers!
The first thing to go was the moose antlers on the fireplace mantle. A not-far-second was the Miller Genuine Draft half-mirror bar frame thing on the wall. Those two items alone I’m sure had the girls hauling buns like a bakery truck (that’s so old but I still love using it. Perhaps you’d prefer making like a banana and splitting?).
But there was a long way to go, and it involved moving furniture around. I’d sit there and think about the possibilities, how this would look here, and that would look there. I’d talk about it. “Man, we gotta move this stuff around, maybe put that plant over there, and we gotta get rid of all this shit (pointing to a stack of Playstation 2 games).”
I talked a good talk. But the place remained the same. Then Stefano came over.
Doing
Trimmed tree
So this is the difference between a talker and a doer. Being a tinkerer, he was pretty pumped to rearrange things, and I have to admit, it rubbed off on me. But while I’d stand there intellectually rearranging things in my mind, trying to picture the setup, he’d already have one end of the couch lifted up. Pointing to a side table, I’d say, “hmmm, maybe this would go better there,” and he’d already have it lifted up, midway to the new spot.
It was a big lesson for me. For some reason, I don’t like embarking on things I can’t see the end result of. Unless I can imagine how the room will look after all is said and done, I won’t move one thing. But by moving one thing, it leads to something else moving, and then another thing, and soon, the place is rearranged. Sure, the table might not look right there, but at least it gives a different perspective, and it can be moved again. Maybe just a different angle.
Things have a way of falling into place when they’re in motion.
Room redesign as a metaphor
I can extend this to other parts of my life. My writing “career” for example. I feel like I’ve been spinning my wheels for some time, not progressing, but just doing enough to get by. Perhaps this is the reason. I can’t picture what it will look like down the road. So instead of doing just something (anything), I do nothing.
What it boils down to, though, is procrastination. Which is why I emailed Leo Babauta, of zenhabits, about his latest eBook called Un-Procrastination. Leo’s a doer (check out his story for proof). I asked him for a review copy as this has also been a topic of interest around the Matador editorial team. The PDF is in my Inbox.
I just have to get to it.
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
I like your post Carlos, and I think there are different types of people in the world. The doers and the naysayers. The naysayers always come up with reasons why you can’t do something, it’s too dangerous, difficult, expensive. The doers think of it as an adventure, fun and of ways to save money. Now naysayers don’t wake up in the morning thinking “I’m going to be a naysayer” but often just fall into a habit. Most people are naysayers.
I’ve found a good way to break out of naysaying is to develop a “RFN” attitude. RFN = Right F**ing Now.. maybe not the most polite thing but if not now when? later is often a long time to never. Whenever I’ve been in the rfn mind-frame I tend to get a whole lot of things done and develop a plan. Want to stop procrastinating? You did a great step reaching out to Leo but you have to read the book and put these things into action. Like your neighbor who tinkers, sometimes you have to juggle a bunch of things at the same time to see what works best.
cheers -
Thanks Scott. I wouldn’t say I’m a naysayer, quite the opposite, I am generally positive. The intention is always there, it’s the action that’s lacking…and we all know actions speak louder than words. This little lesson here has inspired me and given me energy. I’d like to keep this momentum going and eventually become a doer!
I think the world of technology has also worsened the basic human tendency toward procrastination (for example, I should be finishing a piece I was writing until 5 minutes ago. I’m almost done. What did I do instead of finish? Check FB [which I block from 9-12, and again from 1-6] and came to this piece. And…so on). So we feel like we are constantly doing stuff without getting anything done.
I’ve never fallen into the “doer” category unless it happens to be a spontaneous trip. Then I’m a total doer (i.e. run away from my responsibilitieser) without a second thought.
Ahem. Back to said piece.
Loved this Carlo. Although I am no where near as active as Stefano, i most certainity “move the furniture” before I know what the whole room will look like, while bruce would sit on the couch and want to talk about it!
Keep talking cause we’re listening. I’d say your blogging is a step in the right direction. Especially if Stefano keeps coming over to assist you. LOL LOVE IT. Keep typing.
Have a great WEEK.
Nice one, Carlo. I also find that our roles can change when we’re around different people. My parents are decidedly NOT doers (when it comes to home maintenance, anyway), so when I visit them I go into crazy mode–raking the yard, throwing out old video tapes, digging up the basketball pole they got me for my eighth birthday and has been rusted beyond use for like 15 years…
@Christine Exactly. Feel like we’re doing things without really doing anything. Quite a conundrum.
@Suzi Me and Bruce should get together! Think we have much to discuss
@Kellie Thank you. Means a lot to me. Seriously.
@Hal I think it must be a parent thing. My parents’ garage is so full of stuff from 30 years ago it drives me mad. I love that you used “video tapes.”
Hehe, I read this while procrastinating from writing an AOL article. Go me.
Cool post, though. But I think I’d actually dig the moose antlers and beer gear. I LOVE loving with boys…as long as they’re clean.
I know somewhere you can move in in Nelson, Candice…
Loved this post. I always seem to be switching roles from doer to talker and back in various aspects of my life (from health & exercise to work and relationships).
I totally hear Christine. Technology does suck most of the time.